Welcoming Luke Stanford Plessman

Luke Stanford Plessman

March 18th, 2017, 2:07 am

7 lbs 7.8 oz

20.5 inches

It was a wild, crazy week at our house last week, and I look back it now and just have to laugh. In all my speculations about how our second little boy's big arrival would unfold, I never thought it would happen quite how it did. It's going to take some telling, so bear with me as I record for posterity what was probably the craziest, most intense, awful, and yet absolutely most wonderful weekends of my life.

At my 40 week appointment, I was dilated to a 1 and 80% effaced. We tentatively schedued the induction for Sunday, March 20th (8 days past my due date). I was hopeful I would go into labor on my own (isn't everyone?), but I also accepted that it was going to happen however it was going to happen, and there wasn't much I could do to change it! Worrying certainly wasn't going to help. ;)  So I just told myself to trust that God knew exactly how it should be, and that however it went down would be for the best. 

My mom got into town on Monday night, two days after my due date. Tuesday morning, when we woke up, Jace had thrown up everywhere-his bedding, jammies, crib, and the carpet were covered in vomit. Poor baby. We put him in the tub and cleaned up, and he seemed pretty normal for the rest of the day, other than a decreased appetite. No fever, and he had lots of energy and spent the day playing with his toys and hanging out with me and Mimi. When bedtime rolled around, we got him completely ready for bed and decided he was probably ok to have a cup of milk, since he asked for it and hadn't shown any signs of being ill all day. He was sitting calmly on daddy's lap, snug as a bug, when without warning he heaved EVERYWHERE. We cleaned him (and Colt) up again, put him down, and the next day he was a little more fatigued, had a low-grade fever, and spent the day watching movies and taking it easy. However, he didn't throw up again, and by Thursday he was good as new! But Colt had been battling a cold all week, and my mom felt like she was fighting off a bug as well...I was a little nervous that I would have a newborn to take care of and three people to nurse back to health. My little post-partum army was falling apart before the partum was even post!

I was scheduled for a non-stress test on Thursday. They also performed a bio-physical ultrasound, and we got an amazing picture of baby's face. It was so clear, and it made me very excited to get this little guy here so I could meet him and kiss his cute cheeks. All the testing went really well, except they were unable to catch baby "practice-breathing." That's not uncommon, and all the nurses were surprised when the on-call doctor wanted me to come back again the next day, Friday, to do another non-stress test (I'm told this particular doctor is very cautious). I had my OBGYN appointment the next day as well, but luckily they were able to schedule the test right before my appointment next door, so I wouldn't have to come back twice. 

Colt decided to stay home Friday to get some extra rest and try to shake his cold before baby got here, so he was able to take me to my appointments while my mom stayed home with JJ. I didn't feel right all morning-I had no appetite, some nausea that came and went, and a couple other little things that made me wonder if today was the day, but I didn't want to get my hopes up too much, since JJ had a stomach bug earlier in the week. The non-stress test went well, baby was healthy and extremely content-no signs of imminent arrival from this guy! At the OBGYN appointment right after, 2:30 pm, they checked the baby on ultrasound and then looked to see if I had progressed since last week. I was a little under 90% effaced, but still just 1 cm dilated. I mentioned that I had been having some flu-like symptoms, and my doctor said they could potentially be a sign of labor, but that it might also just be JJ's stomach bug. My induction was officially scheduled for 6:00 pm on Sunday and he wished us luck! Colt and I got back in the car to head home, and by then I was starting to feel worse and worse. The light symptoms from this morning were getting worse, and I wasn't sure I would be able to make it home without getting sick. 

Sure enough, as we turned onto the back road ten minutes from our house, I rolled down the window and vomited several times all over the back door of the Corolla. Colt pulled over and I proceeded to have three more episodes before I was ready to continue on home. I felt some relief, but after going upstairs to take a bath and change clothes, I was ready to start all over again. I spent the afternoon literally heaving anything and everything I'd ingested that day right back up again. Even a sip of water was enough to send me running for the bathroom. In just a couple of hours, I had nothing left and was vomiting stomach acid. I honestly do not remember the last time I was that sick. Poor Colt, who had taken the day off to rest and recoup himself, spent the afternoon holding back my hair and rubbing my back while my mom took care of JJ. The worst part was that I now knew my earlier symptoms weren't labor, they were the flu. I was pretty disappointed, but even more nervous that this stomach bug would weaken me so much that I wouldn't be able to be induced on Sunday-I knew my body wouldn't be able to handle labor, especially an induced labor, when it was so depleted. And to top it all off, the Braxton Hicks that I'd been having all week were getting more frequent and and uncomfortable due to how dehydrated I'd become. I was so miserable. I crawled into bed and Colt turned on Father of the Bride, Part II for me. 

During the movie, we decided to see how frequently my Braxton Hicks were coming, just in case it meant I needed to go to the hospital for fluids. Between 5:30 and 8:00 pm, I had over 15 Braxton Hicks contractions that were really uncomfortable, though they were irregularly spaced. Colt thought it would be a good idea to call Labor and Delivery to check-in and see what they had to say, even though I didn't want to bother them with something dumb like Braxton Hicks. The nurse on the phone told Colt that a flu-bug will definitely cause Braxton Hicks to come more frequently and to become more intense, and to continue to watch them and try to drink some water. That conversation was around 7:00 pm. By 7:30 pm, I couldn't sit still or lay down through the contractions, and although I could talk through them, it was effortful. Standing up made them more bearable, but I had to bend over when they came. At this point, I was in tears. I couldn't believe how badly I was handling these Braxton Hicks, and I felt like such a wimp. With Jace, contractions hurt for sure, but I never cried. This time, I wasn't even in labor, and the pain was already putting me under the table. If I couldn't even handle a few stupid Braxton Hicks, how on earth was I going to survive actual labor when I was induced on Sunday?! 

I was a mess and sobbed to Colton that there was no way I was going to be able to deliver a baby on Sunday if I couldn't even manage to get through these dumb false contractions. I was sure I knew the difference between the two, because I had experienced both BH and true labor with JJ. Jace's labor started with period-like cramps that got increasingly more painful and regularly spaced. They were clearly different from the irregular tightening of my belly, which is what I had been experiencing all day (actually, all week) this time around. I knew they just hurt more now because I was so tired and dehydrated from the flu.  I decided to take a shower because my back was sore and I knew that moving around and changing positions can sometimes help alleviate BH, so I hopped in and was washing my hair when Colt came in, saw me crying and doubled over in pain, and told me he thought we should go to the hospital. I told him I didn't want to. The hospital is 40 minutes away, and I KNEW I was not in labor. These were Braxton Hicks, no question, and I didn't think I could handle a 40 minute ride there in so much discomfort, just to be told to go home again and face another painful ride home. He called Labor and Delivery anyways, and when he described what I was feeling, they suggested I come in to be checked because it sounded like it could be labor. I knew it wasn't, and part of me really didn't want to go...but part of me really did, because I figured they could at least give me some anti-nausea medicine and an IV so I felt better. 

My mom came upstairs to check in and see what the plan was, watched us as we scrambled around grabbing last minute items to pack up for the hospital, and followed us downstairs to the front porch. I doubled over with another contraction, and she put her hand on my back. Later, she told me at the point she was positive I was in labor, because my back was rock hard. I got in the car and she pulled Colt aside and told him to make sure I breathed through these contractions, because that's what they were, and to let her know when we got checked in at the hospital. We brought a big bowl with us in case I threw up on the way there, but luckily, the vomiting seemed to have been put on hold. I still felt vaguely nauseated, but the pain of the "Braxton Hicks" seemed to negate the need to throw up (plus my stomach was completely empty). I think my body just realized it had to pick: labor or the flu, but I couldn't do both! Thank goodness, it chose labor. ;) We left our house a little after 8:00 pm. Colt held my hand, sped whenever possible, and (carefully) ran a couple red lights all while reminding me to breathe whenever the contractions started. It was awful, but breathing was definitely more effective than crying, and the mindset that this really might be labor and not just my body's reaction to the flu was helpful in dealing with the pain as we made the trip to the hospital.

We got to the Pavilion at about 9:00 pm and I hobbled into the elevator clutching Colt's arm like an old lady. It must have been obvious that I was in a lot of pain because the security guards didn't say anything other than "We will let them know you're on your way up!" Another contraction hit as soon as we stepped into Triage and I couldn't walk. As soon as it passed, I leaned over onto the front desk and started to cry again. I was so nervous they were going to turn me away because I wasn't really in labor. Part of me knew that I was, but part of me was still afraid it wasn't real, and that all the throwing up earlier had just intensified what was actually false labor. The nurse we spoke with on the phone approached and asked the front desk lady if she could take me back right away. She told me not to worry, that it looked like I was definitely in labor. She took me back to check my progress, and I was at a 3. That made me feel better-I was afraid I would still be at a 1 like I was 6 hours earlier! Then she said something that struck fear into my flu-ish, panicky heart: she told me they don't admit until patients are at least a 4. I looked at her in absolute horror and begged her to please not send me home, the drive is 40 minutes, I can't go home...She told me that she would check me in just a few minutes, that she would make some calls, and make sure I got to stay since it was obvious I was so miserable, not just with contractions but with being so ill earlier as well. She was monitoring my contractions and told me she would get me some medicine to take the edge off the pain, as well as some anti-nausea medicine to give me some relief. I was managing some very small sips of water, but my lips and my mouth were chalk-dry. I was incredibly thirsty, but too scared to drink much at risk of throwing it all up again. 

I don't remember the exact order of how it all happened, but she did check me again and I was at a 3.5. Not quite enough to be admitted, but she made it happen and I was given anti-nausea medicine and some pain relief, which made everything SO much better. The medicine and knowledge that I was in labor and being admitted gave me a much needed physical and mental boost. Suddenly, I was able to breathe through the (still very painful) contractions, talk to Colton in between, and drink a little more water, even after the pain meds wore off. The on-call doctor came in to introduce herself and explain that because the baby had a few little drops in his heartbeat, likely due to how crummy I'd felt prior to starting labor, she wanted him to get here sooner rather than later. They were going to watch my natural labor progression, and in a few hours if I wasn't going as fast as she would like to see, they'd give me some Pitocin to speed things along and make sure he was out quickly. Sounded great to me! I didn't think I could handle a long labor anyways, since I hadn't eaten anything since 2:00 pm and barely had anything to drink. 

I was wheeled into my Labor and Delivery room at 10:30 pm, put on an IV of fluids in an attempt to re-hydrate me, and my epidural was in by 11:15 pm. The doctor came to check progress and I was at a 5, so she felt fine about holding off on the Pitocin and waiting until 3:00 am before checking again. With my pain managed and the anti-nausea medication doing it's blessed work, I started to relax and get excited about delivering my sweet boy.  Colt and I chatted with our lovely nurse, Kristin, then tried to get some sleep before I was ready to push. I'd heard and was hoping that my labor would be shorter the second time around, but I didn't want to assume it would be that way, just in case. We turned the lights off and shut our eyes, but just like last time, I didn't get much sleep.  At 1:25 am, I was half asleep and praying that everything would go smoothly, that baby and I would be safe and healthy, when all of a sudden...POP! I heard it, felt it, and saw it. The monitors on my belly jumped, the machines started beeping, and I felt the rush of liquid indicating that my water had broken. We called the nurse right away, who came in and confirmed that's exactly what happened. The doctor broke my water last time, so this was a whole new experience, and kind of a weird one that I wasn't expecting (even though they did tell me during my check that it was definitely a possibility, because they looked ready to go). Because I told her I could feel a little pressure and could tell when I was having a contraction, my nurse decided to check me early, at 1:50 am, even though the plan was to wait until 3:00 am. She checked, smiled at me, and asked if I wanted to try a "practice push," because I was ready to go! I was super happy but also surprised we were at that point already. I looked at Colt and asked him if he was ready. He was! My practice push was apparently too successful, because the nurse quickly told me to stop and not to push anymore, this baby was going to come out in 1 or 2 pushes and they needed the doctor in there first! She called Dr. Allwine, who was clearly shocked and excited I had progressed so quickly (I could hear her through the phone). The doctor arrived at 2:00 am, and we were ready to go!

Dr. Allwine told me to wait for a strong contraction, and to push when I felt the urge. I let them know when I was ready and as I started pushing, the Dr. quickly told me to slow down and try shorter, lighter pushes, because baby was coming out too quickly! And that's how, at 2:07 am, within one contraction and in under two minutes, my little Luke Stanford Plessman entered the world. Safe, healthy, and looking so tiny. They put him on my chest and he cried his little heart out...the heart that I'd just seen on an ultrasound 12 hours earlier. He was (and is) so perfectly beautiful. I noticed how fuzzy his little back, neck, and arms were, his long fingernails, his perfectly round and tiny head, and the adorable excess of wrinkles that (I'm hoping) will soon fill up with lots of baby chub. We knew right away his name wasn't Isaac, and both Colt and I still loved Luke. We took about 20 minutes, asking each other back and forth: "What do you think? Is he a Luke? Do you still like it? Does he look like a Luke?" He did. His middle name was always Stanford, ever since we found out he was a boy. It's my Grandpa Christensen's first name, though he always went by Dee. I've felt throughout the entire pregnancy that we always knew this one's name. There wasn't a lot of debate about it, although we both had other names we liked and considered...but Luke Stanford has always felt like his name. I think he and Grandpa were buddies up there. 

From first painful contraction to baby out, my labor was about 8.5 hours (Jace was 27 hours, 1.5 hrs  of pushing by comparison). It was such a blessing, because I really don't know if I would have held up well under a lengthy labor this time around. 

We aren't sure if the flu jump-started my labor, or if labor would have happened that day regardless of whether or not I was sick, or if it was never really the flu at all, but the start of labor...it's not important, I guess, but here is something kind of neat: My sister-in-law, Kristy, was due at the end of March. However, she was scheduled to be induced March 16th, because her baby was on track to be too big for her to deliver. But the 16th came and her induction had to be postponed because labor and delivery was too busy. The next day, St. Patrick's Day, her labor was again postponed...and I went into labor that afternoon/evening. I had Luke at 2:00 am, and Kristy was induced a few hours later in the wee hours of the morning, and had her baby, Corbin, that very afternoon! So Luke has a little cousin birthday-twinner. We joked about this happening but never thought it actually would. And if I hadn't gotten the flu, my labor might have started later or I may have had to be induced, and our little guys wouldn't have come down on the same cloud. Maybe they needed each other for moral support. 

I love my little Luke. He is so sweet and beautiful, I already can't imagine our family without him. He looks so much like JJ's newborn pictures, but with slight, almost deliberate, differences here and there. He also looks very much like his handsome daddy. His name means "Light giving," and he has brought the sweetest light into our home.

 I'm so grateful for all my boys. I can't believe I have two kids, two amazing little boys. I feel more blessed than I can say. I'm so happy, and so tired, and SO HAPPY (and did I mention, so tired?). Heavenly Father has given me so much, and I hope I can live up to the trust he's put in me and love and raise and these boys like the precious gifts that they are. 

38 Weeks, 2 Days: The Home Stretch

Two pictures today, to make up for the sad lack of belly pictures this go-around ;)

How Far Along? 38 weeks, 2 days. Baby's Size Equivalent? A spaghetti squash! I sometimes feel like a spaghetti squash. Maternity Clothes? Sure thang! They're so comfy. How Are You Sleeping? Some nights are better than others. I've been trying to drink all my water before 5:00 pm to cut down on all the late-night bathroom visits. I'm not sure if that's the best way to go about it, but it's hard to roll the spaghetti squash out of bed these days.  Best moment this week? Well, the week just started...but my sister, new niece, and my mom are coming to visit us this weekend! There may or may not be homemade cinnamon rolls involved, we shall see. Weird pregnancy moment? My belly just feels so heavy lately. It's hard to sit or stand straight up; I kind of have to roll onto my side and push myself up from there. And i've been having some aches and pains I don't remember having the first time around with JJ, like in my right shoulder blade, and other *ahem* places. Any Movement: Oh yes. He's been throwing 'bows since last night! I keep seeing and feeling these sharp little protuberances on the sides of my belly that come and go, and it feels incredibly strange. Anything making you queasy? Naw. How About Cravings? Still loving peanut butter, oatmeal, and lately I'm big into tropical fruits and flavors, like mango and coconut. Although, I'm not sure that's pregnancy related so much as excitement for spring and summer sunshine! What I'm Looking Forward To: Getting to meet this baby! And also being able to eat normal meals and not have to worry about digestive issues. 

When I ran cross-country in high school, racing was never my favorite part. Practices were fine, and I really enjoyed the actual running, but something about the pressure of racing and the thought of having to push myself so hard for so long was kind of stressful. One thing about long-distance running is that you can tell yourself during the race that you're almost done, that you are 2/3's of the way there...but that means there is still a mile to go! Or you can see the finish line from 800 meters away and you feel so close, it's only 800 meters away, you're almost there, you can do it! And yet, at the same time, it's still a whole 800 meters (2 laps around the track) away! So close, and yet so far. It is a total mental game, and not unlike the last few weeks of pregnancy. I'm to the point where my doctor tells me baby could come any day (!) but he could also take his sweet time and wait another three weeks. But the finish line is in site! I'm grateful things have gone well so far, and I want baby to take as long as he needs to be healthy and strong for his big debut. I just need to hang in there for those last 800 meters. ;)

Two

New "choo-choo" from Aunties and cousins is a hit!

Grammy says Colt used to lay exactly like this when he played with his trucks and cars as a little boy

My baby turned two years old a couple of weeks ago...or as Jace would say: "tyooo." We kept it really low-key this year, since he's still pretty little. But we were lucky enough to have Grammy in town from Colorado to celebrate with us! I made him special birthday pancakes with sprinkles and a candle for breakfast before I had to run out to a doctor's appointment that morning. On the way home, I stopped to pick up a few balloons, sprinkles, and a candle for his cake. Jace loved his Thomas the Train and Firetruck balloons; it really is the little things, isn't it? We hung up a "Happy Birthday" banner and tied his balloons to our benches, and the day started to feel pretty festive even though we didn't have a lot planned. For dinner, we met Colt at Chick Fil A and Jace noshed on chicken nuggets, applesauce, and a mini-chocolate cupcake that Colt brought as a little birthday surprise. Afterwards, we played for a few minutes and then headed home. I made a banana birthday cake (Colt and I thought it was delicious, it reminded me a little of our wedding cake), but Jace wasn't super impressed with it, unfortunately. I think it was the cream cheese frosting that turned him off. Oh well, next year I'll stick with "choc-ut." 

Grammy kind of saved our butts as far as presents go! Jace doesn't need a whole lot, especially since his birthday is right after Christmas, and he isn't very interested in opening gifts, so C and I just ordered him one present this year: a pair of bright blue Nikes! However, they got delayed in the mail and hadn't arrived by the time his birthday rolled around. Mom and Dad dropped the ball on that one. Luckily, Grammy is basically Mary Poppins and she pulled a whole pile of presents out of her magical suitcase! She and JJ's aunties, uncles, and cousins got him clothes, books, and the cutest little train track set that moves on it's own when you press a button. He was totally enamored with it, and played with it non-stop until bedtime.

Our present arrived a couple days later, and we kind of thought that Jace wouldn't care too much about a new pair of sneakers. He needed some shoes the next size up, so it was more of a practical gift. But when Colt took those shoes out of the box and showed them to JJ, he wanted to put them on RIGHT AWAY. NOW, DADDY! So on his feet they went, and he proceeded to squeal with joy and run around the living room, falling every few steps because they are still a little big. When it was time to get ready for bed, he refused to take them off. Haha!! Even now, two weeks later, I can't get him to wear any other pair of shoes unless I take special precautions to keep his bright blue birthday sneaks out of sight. I think it's safe to say he likes them. ;)

At two years old, Jace...

-Says "two" when he hears anyone say "one." However, we can't get him to say it when we ask him how old he is. 

-Likes to hold my hand in the car. He will extend his chubby little hand and plead: "Hannie?!" When I reach back and grab his hand, he hangs on tight to my fingers and goes back to reading his book or playing with his trucks with his free hand. I love it. I hope he wants to do this for a few more years, at least. 

-Gets a little bit anxious when I hold another kid. It's not terrible, but he comes right over and wants to be held, too. I'll literally have my hands full when this baby arrives!

-Still loves to play hockey! He runs around with his plastic golf club yelling "P-ay hockey! P-ay hockey!"

-Is producing two and three word utterances, but he still mostly speaks in unintelligible run-on sentences and long paragraphs. He has a lot to say! I think this leads to some of his tantrums, when we can't understand everything he is trying to tell us. Which leads me to my next point...

-Has some pretty epic temper tantrums. Again, I think this is likely due to his age, a combo of being misunderstood, not getting his way when he is understood, not wanting to be contained, and maybe a little bit of new baby-anxiety. It's definitely hard for me to be patient when he throws a tantrum right now. Hopefully I'll be better once the baby gets here, as long as the horomones settle down (fingers crossed!).

-Has a good time in nursery as long as either myself, Colton, Grammy, or Mimi stays in there with him. Otherwise, he screams the entire time, poor soul. 

-Hates to be contained in any way, shape, or form. For instance, our house sits on a half acre of property, and has a play structure, dirt to dig in, rocks and trees to climb on, etc. But you would not believe how difficult it is to keep him in our yard. He wants to go outside and wander anywhere and everywhere else. Or if we take him to the park, he plays for a minute or two on the playground, then wants to leave and wander around the neighborhood, the parking lot, the fields...anywhere other than where we brought him (although the last couple of times, he's done much better)! Another example: when we go to church and try to sit in the chapel, he wants to be in the hall. When we sit in the hall, he wants to be in the chapel. And although he's improved a lot, he has a hard time staying in our pew. He is an explorer by nature I think, and even though right now I'm too tired to keep up with him and I get frustrated that he can't just be content where he's at, I think it kind of a cool character trait. He's persistent and adventurous, and I can't wait to see all the places he'll go! Maybe after I'm done having kids, I'll have more energy to follow along a time or two ;)

I love this two year old whirlwind. His smile is infectious, his eyes light up with joy, and I think if you look up the word "exuberant" in the dictionary, you'll just find a picture of my boy. He's a treasure, and I can't wait to see him become a big brother to another precious boy. I'm a lucky lady to be surrounded by all these incredible guys!

Thank You

Thank you for everything you do. 

You are an incredible husband.

A loving father.

Always supportive, always looking out for our family's best interest.

And the weird part is, I don't think you know how unique and remarkable of a person that you are. 

Thanks for letting me be your buddy. Just feeling so grateful for you today.

I love you.

32 Weeks 3 Days

A bump picture at last! We have been terrible at taking these, mostly because my phone storage is always full.

How Far Along? 32 weeks, 3 days. Baby's Size Equivalent? A half-gallon of milk! Moooo Maternity Clothes? Same old story! I ordered some sweats pants with a Nike gift card I received at a White Elephant gift exchange, and they are my favorite thing. How Are You Sleeping? Not great, to be honest. On my best nights, I'm up twice. But usually it's three or four times. Additionally Jace's flu/cold finally caught up to Colt and I this weekend, so I was up every two hours. It's harder to get comfy, and breathing is a bit more difficult these days...and the last two nights I've been woken up with a charley horse in my leg! Doesn't make for restful nights ;) Hopefully it will get better once I'm over this cold. Best moment this week? Even though we were sick, it was super nice to have Colt home all day. Weird pregnancy moment? Those dang leg cramps in the middle of the night! My calves were still sore the next day. I woke up yelling, and scared Colt to death-I'm sure he thought I was in early labor.  Any Movement: Yeah! He definitely stretches out in there, trying to get comfy. He pushes out my sides a lot, which is weird to watch. Anything making you queasy? No! But I'm feeling so much pressure and fullness after I eat anything, especially in the evening, and especially with this cold-flu. Even drinking water makes me feel like I'm about to pop. How About Cravings? Strawberries...natural peanut butter (yes, the runny kind, so weird!) and honey...and caesar salad! Not together. What I'm Looking Forward To: Snuggling this little guy! I'm simultaneously excited and terrified to have him here. I'm excited and worried about labor, excited and scared about having a newborn and a toddler, and just plain scared about the sleepless nights! But I'm reading the Tao of Pooh, and it's a helpful reminder that there is a natural rhythm and "way" to things. When you learn to work with circumstances for what they are, things have a way of working out, with little stress and minimal effort. When you fight situations and try to make them into what you think they should be, it makes life more difficult. I'm going to try to remember that this time around!
There is a brief analogy shared in my book from the works of Chuang-tse, about a man who was standing in front of a waterfall, watching the churning turbulence created by the force of the waterfall hitting the pool below. All of a sudden, he saw an old man in the middle of the turgid water, and called to his friends for help in rescuing the old man. But by the time they all ran over, the elderly fellow had emerged from the water and was strolling along the bank. They were mystified as to how he had survived, and certain that he must have magical powers. When they asked him how he managed to live, he replied:
"I began to learn while I was very young...now I am certain of success. I go down with the water and come up with the water. I follow it and forget myself. I survive because I don't struggle against the water's superior power. That's all."
:)

30 Weeks and 5 Days: So Close, And Yet, So Far

Sorry, this is obviously not a belly picture. But it's the only recent photo I have of myself, and it happens to be the one I took on Photo Booth to send to my sister after I cut my hair off in a fit of pregnancy-induced spontaneity last week. I'll try to post a preggo-eggo picture soon. 

At almost 31 weeks, I find myself starting to think  "I'm almost done!" Then I remember I have at least two more months, probably more like two and a half, and I feel a little deflated knowing that I haven't hit the home-stretch quite yet. ;) I was talking to my cute cousin who just announced that she is pregnant with her fourth child, and she concisely summed it up for me: "Pregnancy gets less glamorous with each baby. You just have to remember you DO get a baby at the end." Preach!

How Far Along? 30 weeks and 5 days...7 months and 3 weeks on Saturday. Not that I'm counting down, or anything ;) Baby's Size Equivalent? A summer cantaloupe. Not a spring cantaloupe, mind you. Summer. Maternity Clothes? Some of my normal clothes still fit, like my sweaters, lower-rise jeans, and longer, stretchier shirts...but I really just prefer my softest pair of leggings and a hoodie, or loose-fitting shirts. I've had a really low tolerance for anything even somewhat fitted around my midriff this time around. I've given up on bras unless I'm at work or church. How Are You Sleeping? Pretty well, all things considered. I have to get up at least twice a night to, ahem, relieve myself. And some nights are better than others. But overall, I can't complain! Best moment this week? Jace has been asking to sit on the potty, which is cool! He's also been talking up a storm. It's so fun to watch him grow. Weird pregnancy moment? Well, over Christmas break I got the random but powerful urge to chop my hair. So I did! Not myself, mind you. I sought the aid of a professional. And I love it! Any Movement: Yep! The movements feel a bit smoother, though, rather than pokes and jabs. I think he's running out of room. Anything making you queasy? No. I don't know how some ladies deal with morning sickness their entire pregnancy. They are warriors and should be canonized. How About Cravings? Oatmeal chocolate chip cookies sound puh-retty tasty right now. But I've also been enjoying really strong flavors at meals, such as dill or sweet pickles, blue cheese, or salad dressing made with balsamic vinegar and mustard. What I'm Looking Forward To: A beautiful new year with my incredible husband and TWO little sons. I can't believe I'm going to be a mama of two...I can't be old enough for this. I'm pretty sure I just got my drivers license like a couple (twelve!!) years ago...Also, my wonderful sister is expecting her little girl any day now!! They've kept her name a complete secret, so I'm excited to find out what they are going to call her, and meeting the first gran'baby girl on my side of the family.

Holiday Recap

Mimi was making him laugh hysterically by offering him sips of her drink, then wiping his lip with a napkin. He might have inherited her peculiar sense of humor. ;)

Enjoying his new coloring book and crayons back at home. All great artists work best while wearing pants on their heads.  

Jace got a very realistic-looking toy Dyson vacuum from C and I, and his cousins gave him a cute little broom/mop/dustpan set. He loves them! He has been extra helpful around the house these days, sweeping up dirt into his dustbin and throwing it in the trash. Love my little helper.

At Leavenworth, pre-tantrums.

He LOVED the Christmas "tee." His favorite ornaments were a little red car and a miniature train. He said goodnight to the Christmas tree every night before heading up to bed, and he wanted the lights on first thing in the morning.

December was a bit of a whirlwind over here. I think that's probably how the holidays are, once you become a parent. My birthday was on the 16th, and both boys spoiled me with flowers and cards, perfume/body spray/lotion, and the traditional Oreo ice cream dessert that Colt has been making me every year (except for one) since before we started dating. Bonus: Colt took a half-day and surprised me by coming home at lunchtime! My parents came into town that weekend, and Colt took me out for a birthday lunch and a movie (we saw Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them, and we both liked it a lot. I'm excited for it to hit Redbox). Then, on Sunday, we braved the pass and headed out to Leavenworth. We didn't stay too long; it was bitter cold (14 degrees or something like that), and Jace was having meltdown after meltdown. We still enjoyed ourselves, though, with lots of hot chocolate and a German bratwurst for dinner. We watched the movie "Miracle," over and over again-it's Jace's latest favorite. He wakes up every morning asking for "Hockey? Hockey?!" Then he goes and grabs  one of his plastic golf clubs and a little golf ball and runs around the house using them as a hockey stick and puck. Should I start saving for skates and pads now, or wait a few years? ;)

We spent Christmas and New Years Eve at my parents house in Oregon. Remember how I mentioned in my last post that Jace was having some weird night-wakings? Well, while were at my parents house, the purpose behind those bizarre sleep patterns was manifested: his language took off in a pretty epic way. He learned multiple new words and phrases every day, started finishing the sentences in his books as we read together, and has been putting 2 and 3 words together. Additionally, he's been pushing our barstool chairs up to the counter and climbing over to the sink to play in the faucet (we've been working hard to teach him that sitting in the chairs is ok, but climbing on the table and counters is a no-go). He also started refusing to drink out of his sippy cups at Mimi and Papa's. He wanted to drink out of the regular cups, and he did a great job most of the time. And over the last couple days, he's started asking to sit on the potty! December was a big month for Mister Jace. 

Colt and I kept the gift-giving rather small this year. We only bought JJ a couple of presents and stocking stuffers. He doesn't really need anything, and isn't old enough to ask for anything specific. He also hasn't quite grasped the magic of opening presents, and he's not super interested until after he sees what's inside. He did really enjoy the few small gifts we got him, as well as the gifts from his aunties and uncles, though. He especially loved his choo-choo bathrobe, the "janitor supplies" from his cousins, his Lightning McQueen hotwheels car, and his truck and train books. He's a spoiled little monkey.

My parents did a "giving tree" Christmas this year: they put gift cards to stores, restaurants, and movie tickets all over the tree, and my sister and her husband and Colt and I were able to use them for date nights all week! It was so nice to be able to spend some quality time together and take advantage of the free childcare-Jace LOVES when Mimi and Papa watch him, and he's asked for them pretty much everyday since we got home. 

We drove home on New Years Day so that we could enjoy the following Monday off together as a family. We cleaned the house, took down all of the inside Christmas decorations (I'm holding out on taking down the outdoor Christmas lights, I just love them so much), ran a few errands, and tried to soak in the last little bit of the holiday season. I've had a little bit of a hard time adjusting back to normal life this week. I think my brain is still on vacation!

My resolutions for this year:

1. Worry less, and trust God more.

2. Read the New Testament from cover to cover.

3. Be kinder to and more appreciative of my body, and be grateful for my health. Pregnancy is truly an exercise in being kind and patient with yourself-while growing the baby, in recovery, as well as throughout the post-partum aftermath! But our bodies and our health are such miraculous gifts. I want to treat mine with more gratitude and appreciation, and become adept at recognizing it's cues and giving it what it needs. It is doing a pretty awesome job at growing this baby for me, after all.

4. Use my body as a tool to do the things I love. Run more! Go swimming! Ride bikes! Hike with my boys! Go camping! Snuggle my babies! Enjoy being the only girl in a houseful of adventurous boys.

5. Relax and enjoy Colt, Jace, and Littlest Man. I think with Jace, the shock of new motherhood and the responsibility I felt to take care of him and do things the "right way," or way I thought things should be done, created more stress and prevented me from fully appreciating every moment. And I would get so frustrated and stressed out once he hit his 3 month sleep regression and his naps got so short, and his night wakings increased...I was so tired and just wanted to fix it so we could get some rest! This time, I'm going to try to be a little more easy-going and accept the good and the tough times for what they are, and be grateful for each moment. Because there is purpose in both. And I'm realizing time goes so fast-I think I'll try a bit harder to treasure those private moments in the middle of the night with my new babe, rather than frantically googling "how to get my baby to sleep through the night" on my phone at 3:00 am. Or at least, reduce the googling. ;)Reducing the googling in general should probably be my 6th resolution...baby steps.

I can't believe Jace will be two years old at the end of this month. And in 9-10 weeks, we get to meet our newest little guy! There will be so many changes this year, and last year brought so much joy...I'm a little sad and scared to see 2016 go! Sometimes I get a a bit anxious that life is too good right now, too easy, and that trials and adversity MUST be right around the corner to balance everything out (see New Years Resolution #1). But I'm hopeful that 2017 will be just as great, if not better, than 2016. God is good, and mindful of each one of us. So grateful for my boys, for our good health and strong bodies, for our home, for our families. Happy 2017!